Parenting Adult Children: Boundaries & Grace
Nobody warns you that the hardest parenting years might come after your kids are grown. We opened with a story Jay picked up in a Delta Lounge, a man quietly putting on tefillin who turned out to be a Soviet Jew that did not learn he was Jewish until his family reached America. That pulled us into the Rebbe and Soviet Jewry, quiet diplomacy versus loud demonstrations, and a father exiled to Kazakhstan whose wife made ink from berries so his Torah could survive.
Then we turned to the question a lot of you have written in about: how do we stay parents to our kids once they are adults with lives, spouses, and kids of their own?
In this episode, we get into:
Why grown children still need their parents more than anyone expects, and what that means for us
Where the boundary sits, and how to give feedback that lands from a place of love instead of criticism
Protecting your spouse first, and why in-laws have to tread more carefully than parents
Raising kids who become friendly with you without ever forgetting you are the parent
Free choice, and how you can do everything right and still get a result you did not plan for
Overbearing parents, helicopter moms, the Little League dad, and when to bring in a third party
Whether you are the parent watching your kid make a call you would not make, or the adult child trying to keep the peace, come sit with us. There is grace in here for both sides.