Planning a Chabad Wedding
It is just CL and me this week because we wanted to give her a chance to speak (sorry, Rabbi).
Her oldest son got engaged a few weeks ago, there has already been an engagement party in Crown Heights and a second one on the West Coast, and the wedding is coming fast. So we thought people would be interested: what actually goes into planning a Chabad Hasidic wedding?
The answer starts with a phone call where you plan a huge party with people you have never met, and it only gets more interesting from there.
In this episode, we get into:
Why dating stays a secret until the engagement is announced at the Rebbe’s grave, and why the whole thing takes weeks instead of years
Who pays for what, the fifty-fifty split, and the gifts each side is expected to give
Takana weddings, the thirty thousand dollar all in package that makes sure every couple gets a beautiful wedding, and why the community treats that as everyone’s responsibility
The seven days before the wedding when the bride and groom do not see or speak to each other, get escorted everywhere, and get treated like a king and a queen
Fasting on your wedding day, why it is considered a mini Yom Kippur, and the Rosh Chodesh loophole
The badeken, the completely opaque veil, and the moment the next morning when the bride covers her hair for the first time
Sheva Brachos, a full week of parties, and why the wedding is really a celebration of the entire family
Come for the logistics, stay for ChayaLeah whispering under her own chuppah asking if anyone was even out there.